Using Pronouns Like A Boss

Why they’re important and why they’re non negotiable

Margot Q

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October 16th was International Pronoun Day.

Using correct pronouns is an act of basic respect. Pronouns aren’t “preferred”, and they’re not optional — they are the pronouns that a person uses to best reflect their identity at that point in time. Pronouns, like gender and sexuality, are fluid, and can change over time as someone’s understanding of who they are (as well as their personal growth and development) is reflected in the pronouns they use.

Pronouns are super important to get right, and although it can take a while to get someone’s pronouns down pat, the effort is worth the comfort and acceptance of all involved. If you intentionally misgender someone to make a point or when you’re angry at them then you are, in fact, a prick.

It’s especially important for parents, family members, and partners to respect the pronouns a person uses. The validation received from loved ones accepting your identity can have a markedly positive effect on the mental health of a person, especially our tamariki, rangatahi, and our baby queers!

Common pronouns

She/Hers
He/Him
They/Them
Ey/Em
Xe/Xem
Ze/Hir

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Margot Q

Writer from Aotearoa New Zealand. Studying MA & MEd. Custodian of nearly $100k in student loans. www.margotq.com